Introduction
Divorce characters have become such a staple in the media that it is harder to find a show without one than with one. Continue reading this list of 10 TV shows and movies that address subjects such as divorce, co-parenting, generational trauma, and more, to see just how common the “divorce character” has become.
Love is Blind
Clay Gravesande was a finalist on reality TV show Love is Blind, who falls for and almost marries another contestant on the show, until he makes a last-minute decision at the altar to not get married, still haunted by the generational trauma from his parents’ divorce. Clay’s father was unfaithful to his mother for many years, and the resulting divorce due to this infidelity left Clay and his family in lots of pain. Afraid of becoming like his father, Clay is unable to commit to a marriage out of fear of letting down those he loves. In the finale episode, Clay’s family comes together and addresses this generational trauma for the first time. While Clay still has a long way to go, the conversations he and his family had together were able to begin a healing process.
Keeping Up With the Kardashians
While much of reality TV is scripted or overdramatized, the struggles of co-parenting represented in are very real. The Kardashian matriarch, Kris Jenner, is a divorcee, and many of her children are as well. Kim Kardashian has opened up about how after her divorce with Kanye West, co-parenting has been hard work. She also emphasized the importance of not vilifying the other parent and giving the children the opportunity to keep relationships with both parents and form opinions for themselves.
Parenthood
Parenthood follows three generations of the Braverman family through the complex highs and lows of marriage and parenting. The show is especially good at realistically portraying co-parenting, and how the work that must go into it is worth it to achieve positive results. Parenthood shows that conflict can foster growth and strengthen relationships between parent and child, siblings, and couples.
Four Christmases
This comedy movie deals with one of the most drama filled parts of divorce: holidays. Once joy-filled occasions can become a war-torn scene as divorced parents fight over who gets the kids for Christmas. Four Christmases follows a couple who each have a set of divorced parents and must travel between their four dysfunctional families over just one day. The movie explores the complicated effects divorce can have on children, and how those wounds can be healed.
Girl Meets World
Girl Meets World character Maya Hart is a classic example of how the media represents children of divorce. Abandoned by her father, Maya lives with her mother and grandmother. Maya is rebellious, struggles in school, and is your typical “bad girl”. However, the children’s TV show reveals that her toughness is really a cover, it’s really her way of coping with her vulnerabilities gained from being a child of divorce.
Marriage Story
This movie is known by many for its raw, emotional telling of the divorce between main characters Charlie and Nicole. Charlie and Nicole try to be collaborative from the start, but egos and emotions take control, leading to notorious screaming matches and lots of pain for everyone involved. Their messy divorce takes a toll on everyone, including their son, Henry. Once Charlie and Nicole realize this, the couple is able to resolve their divorce the collaborative way, with civility and understanding, and with the children coming first.
Divorce
The appropriately named HBO series divorce does an excellent job at portraying that while divorce is painful, so is staying in a marriage that is not working. The show addresses the effects divorce has on teenage kids, who are mature enough to understand somewhat what is going on but are sensitive enough to not escape the hurt divorce can cause children to have. Divorce also shows how long the process can be, one that feels never-ending.
Modern Family
Modern Family is a great example of how families can grow and blend after a divorce. Modern Family tackles issues like adoption as well, and the difficulties but mainly joys of welcoming a new child into your family. This beloved sitcom is a great example of how families do not have to be traditional to be full of love.
One Day at a Time
One Day at a Time features single mother Penelope, who raises her two children along with her mother after the divorce of her husband, Victor, who suffered from alcoholism and PTSD. Victor is absent a majority of the time, which often leaves his kids hurt and confused. Kids are often the most affected victims of divorces like these. Through making changes like going into Recovery and trying to be more present, Victor is slowly able to start rebuilding his relationship with his children, but the effects of the divorce still linger. In one episode, Alex, the couple’s son, opens up to his girlfriend that his parents’ divorce was really traumatic for him, and he fears they will meet the same fate. The products of divorce can last well into adulthood, and even affect a child’s future marriage and relationships.
Grey’s Anatomy
Even the perhaps most popular medical drama ever created features divorce in some way. There are multiple plotlines throughout the show’s many seasons that cover co-parenting, divorce, and custody. One specific example is in season 12, characters Callie and Arizona, one the biological mother one the adoptive mother, take their custody battle over their daughter Sofia to court after being unable to negotiate a settlement outside of court. The battle between lawyers and mothers is messy, full of aggression and disrespect. The best interest of Sofia wins out in the end, and her Adoptive mother wins custody. In the same episode, a good example of co-parenting is depicted as separated parents April and Jackson discuss how they will take good care of their baby together, splitting responsibilities and holidays, fight-free. The stark difference between how these two cases of child custody were handled shows how there is a better way to do things than messy court battles that only serve to hurt the child. Changing the divorce culture to a collaborative process creates healthier and happier results for all.
Conclusion
From this list we can deduce that there is no one type of show that features divorce characters. A show doesn’t necessarily need to be called Divorce for it to have divorce in it. Reality TV, beloved sitcoms, and even medical dramas are all examples that include this trope, whether it be the entire premise of the show or simply a side plot. This prevalence is a reflection of the society we live in. Divorce is such a pervasive part of real life, it has become a frequent occurrence in our media as well. If you are dealing with divorce in someway in your own life, watching these kinds of media may bring you comfort, and serve as a reminder that you are not alone.
Citations
Ashley-Nicole Russell, Esq., The Cure for Divorce Culture: Repairing the Damage Within a Lost
Class of People (2d ed. 2019).